I was off for a few days..
I still have over 100 dollars.. and I had an 8mg pill..
I walked the long walk to Marcus's house..
The whole walk there.. I felt sick... I knew 8mg's would just barely take the edge off, but it wouldn't be enough to get me high..
So once I finally got there, at 8:00am.. I went in and saw him, I bought my pills... I bought two 30mg hydromorphone capsules, and 3 8mg dilaudids too..
I talked to him for a bit, he asked me if I could bring him some cartons of export green smokes..
I told him I would try, and I left..
I walked out of the rooms, down the long hallway and into the kitchen.. and there was a girl there named Rebbecca... She was cooking pills in a spoon on the stove.. she said to me "Why don't you shoot up with me? I've got a clean rig" .. I said "No, I don't shoot up.. I just snort them" .. She then said "Well you're wasting them like that.. how many Mg's do you need to do in order to get high?" "... Umm, I dunno, 24 Mg's at least? "
Well, if you shot just one 8mg pill you'd get so high.. and you would end up saving money!"
I thought about it for a second.. it seemed to make sense, it would cost me less... "But I'd never shoot up in my life" I thought... "Sorry Becca, I'm just gonna snort them.. Can I do them here?" "Yeah, but be quick"
She gabbed me a plate and a spoon.. I crushed a 30mg pill and an 8... and made 3 big lines and snorted them..
"Wow" she said "that's a lot of dope to be snorting.. what a waste... that would have lasted me all day"
I was starting to get high, and she was finally done doing her ritual of cooking the pill... she chucked in a piece of a cigarette filter.. and all the liquid disappeared.. Then she took the cover off of a clean needle (also called a rig, works, or sharps) .. she put the tip of the needle into the cotton, and pulled the plunger back..
.. She tipped the needle straight up, and started flicking it with her index finger... there was air bubbles in it, and she was knocking them to the top..
She then pushed forward on the plunger until a tiny bit of liquid came out.
She tied a belt around her arm, and flexed her hand a few times.. her veins popped right up.. She took the needle, and shoved it into her arm.. I watched.. fixated on what I was seeing.. I've never seen this in real life before... She pulled back gently on the plunger.. and I saw the needle fill with a little blood... She let the belt go out of her mouth, and started to push on the plunger.. once in was in her.. she put the cap back on, and chucked it back up into the cupboard..
She sat down, and as soon as she did.. she leaned forward.. and moaned... she sat like that for about 2-3 minutes... she got up.. looked at me.. and said "WOW!... What a rush!".
"how are you feeling?" .. "I'm just starting to get my rush now, but I feel great.. "
The early morning sunrise was shinning through the window..
"You don't feel as good as I feel" she said.. "Probably not, but I've got my addiction under control" ..
No you don't... you're just as bad as me" she said... you just hide it better.. "
I said bye, and left... and walked the long walk home... I stopped at Tims to get a coffee before heading home..
The whole time I was thinking... "Is it really worth it?... why does it feel so good? "
I was walking and thinking about it...
I always pictured it as something gross and disgusting.. like tones of guys and girls in a rundown shack all shooting up with dirty needles and water.. getting hep c and H.I.V..
But she looked clean... I didn't even know she did drugs at first.. it looked almost like a medial procedure..
This was done in a clean house... with clean sterile equipment.. She looked like a doctor giving a patient a shot... This really changed my view on injecting.. it felt weird... "Is it really that bad? I thought?"
I went home..
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